Layoff from work: Day 2

My husband and I are taking part in a 12-week parenting program to learn more about raising a child with ADHD. We have a coaching call each week that involves learning a new skill or tool and talking about our wins and misses over the past week. We build on skills week after week and the program has helped us to be on the same page when we need to handle issues.

One of the tools is SOLVER. It is a step by step plan created by the caregiver and child that can be used for a variety of situations ranging from needing to complete a single task to running errands outside the house. SOLVER is versatile and adaptable and teaches responsibility, problem solving, and time management.

S is for situation: What are we planning ahead for?

O is for options: Ask for reward option ideas for after the plan is successful. Rewards do not need to be elaborate or grand. They can be as simple as telling each other jokes after an important phone call.

L is for Listen: Listen to their ideas and praise for helping with the plan. Plan for potential interruptions and how they will be handled.

V is for Venture: Try the plan out. Notice and acknowledge effort when the plan begins, during the plan, refocusing after a major interruption, and at the end of the plan.

E is for Evaluate: How well did the plan work? Review each step and think about what could be done differently next time.

R is for Reward: Praise them for helping with the plan and give them their reward.

We used SOLVER this morning at our kitchen table for “school” and the morning went incredibly well. It was like sorcery!

The SITUATION was that Calista needed to attend a 9AM meeting with her teacher and available classmates, then write about something positive that has happened since being home. The REWARD that she chose was to take Arya for a walk by herself. Movement breaks are essential for her so we very much encouraged her idea.

The next SITUATION (assignment) was word work and spelling. To try something new, she created a word search online with her weekly words and printed it. This SITUATION required a couple of reminders but the plan still worked! The REWARD was coming with me for a drive to pick up cookie cutters from my mother-in-law at her doorstep.

A smoother morning eased into a nice afternoon. Yesterday and today were very similar yet so very different. I am glad that we had a check in with our coach last night. SOLVER for the win!

I worked on a Backcountry Women writing project this afternoon, video chatted with a friend, rested horizontally but didn’t sleep, and tidied up the kitchen. All in all, a pretty good day!

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