My mental health is strained this week. I am tired, irritable, and emotional. I lack focus and motivation. I am essentially on auto-pilot, just doing enough to get by. I have a couple of exciting activities this week but a part of me wants nothing to do with them. That part of me just wants to hide but not in a productive self-care kind of way. I know that for my self-care and future goals, I need to take part to the best of my ability and so I will march on. Surrounding myself with like-minded women will give me a boost.
The way I feel now, coming out of the Easter holiday is similar to how I felt at Christmas. I recognize patterns and thoughts. It seems that there is a lot of pressure on major holidays for me and I allow it to affect me. I do not feel pressure within my little family but the outside pressures add up and I still do not feel a release from Easter.
Right now, I honestly feel like going into the woods for every major holiday going forward. My husband, daughter, and dogs are welcome to come. I am day dreaming right now of what it would look like for a couple of days to just be by ourselves. I am imagining now that we are in a little cabin with a wood heat stove to keep us warm. We can play a few table-top games, take short hikes, and each do our own individual activities.
It sounds delightful to spend major commercial holidays in the woods. That is where you will find me. Or maybe not, because not being found for that time frame is kind of the point.
